So I'd like to say prior to her dancing into my life for a split second earlier this school year I was making a lot of progress towards the not gonna moan and groan and just move on method. I was pretty content, my Dota game was up then too which really reflects my true peace with myself. Cause if I can't play well it's cause I'm too busy somewhere else in my mind, same thing with running. Before she decided to check up on me, I had managed to have clear thoughts and all that nice shit that doesn't last long for me. After though, I went back to spending nights drifting off wishing I hadn't screwed up cause then I'd have her to talk to, to fall in love with every time I talk to her. I can't fathom trying to fix things with her though. Besides going from "I was abandoned for a couple of months" to "friends" or anything of the like being pretty hard, I also trust myself to behave just as much as I trust her to stay when I misbehave. I guess that's how life fucks you, everything has to be two steps forward and one step back or else it's not really life.
In case you're reading this, I'm not blaming you for where I'm at now. It was my own hole I dug that I jumped into willingly, and I didn't have to answer your "Hey" either.
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