Just Wave Goodbye

So...last night my dad passed. I can't say he was a great father to me, but he wasn't a shitty one either. He tended to treat me like crap but I learned that he just as much yearned for my attention. I feel bad about how I'd look towards him a lot and that our last few encounters were more negative than positive. But last night was horrible in the sense that it took him awhile to die. I couldn't even stand staying there to see it out. I left after he slid into a coma that wouldn't last long. Just all the fuckin machines and watching them pump into and out of him, but not doing anything but just making it easier on him. It was tragic. They took out his breathing tube so he could say his own farewell and he could only gurgle. He'd just gurgle with his eyes bugged out and where I couldn't tell if he knew he was trying to say something or it was just his body seizing up. When I left I could barely say anything. I just didn't want to be awake. I wanted to be out there in a reality where things didn't always end fucky. But, he's fought for the time he had and he suffered long enough. I feel glad that he's dead, because now he's at peace. No more pain and agony for him. No more troubles of the material plain.