It's Not Leather It's Pleather

So, my "legendary" man cave of a basement has been in much need of two new couches for over three months. More like since the start of the year, but my dad and I finally got around to it. We needed a new couch because the current one's cushions have the covers practically shredded off. There's another one down there that's a love seat and a really nice couch to sit in, but that's it, it's only nice to sit in. You can't sleep on it or else the cushions slide off. So, to counter these shredding of cushions problem we got two "leather" couches. I don't remember what the actual term was but it's like leather, except cheaper, durable, and less shiny. Ohhh, how I like my furniture to be shiny. We looked in a couple of places. Three to be exact. The first two were warehouses that didn't even have commercials, which just tells you the quality of their prices. They both said emergency sell off and discounts up to 60% but they barely took off 10%. I really didn't know shit about the furniture business until this week. But the third place, ohoho the third place, I loved. It wasn't where the furniture was crowded together, there was more than two salesmen, and when you walked in you got someone to help you the whole entire time you were there. The other places? The salesman just sat in the back the whole entire time and didn't let us bargain. At the place we bought the couch, WE WERE ALLOWED TO BARTER. You don't know how important that privilege is. You can bring a 1000 dollar price down to around 750. I found though, when I was shopping, that I could imagine myself as a furniture salesmen rather than college, or if I go to clown college(community college) for two years rather than straight to a big fancy one with dorms. Besides the commissions I could actually do it. I'm a born salesmen. I know how to make something seem better than it is or less than it is, depending on what you want. There was a set that I wanted cause I thought it came with a recliner, and I almost got my dad to buy it. Of course, knowing me, I'll probably go to college right after high school. And if I choose the community path, I still probably wouldn't be employed as a furniture salesmen because I'd imagine you need a level of certification or some training, which I doubt they'd want to give to someone that doesn't plan to stay long if it's training. Certification? Um, no, I'm not going to go to college for two years to sell furniture, I'm going to go to college for at least four years and continue it afterwards so as to maximize profit and potentially make a difference in this fucked up country we call America. Oh and the term is "Durablend" sounds fancy.