Ugh, Motherfucking Projects

So I'm working on a project with my friends. And we have a delicate system, we goof off for 6 hours then work on the project for one in the morning. And today was a bad time to. We have the project due next week and it's a big part of my grade, what the fuck are we going to do? We're going to be fucked. We spent half the time looking for a tri-board rather than working on the project, then went to Taco Bell. Just funny, who needs to do the work? But oh well, this wasn't intended to be a long post, just couldn't think of anything else to write.

Jokerring Around

So I was messing around on my computer and listening to the "Ill Mind of Hopsin V" and started listening to the parodies, remixes, and responses. Just to say now, the new Youtube is a piece of shit and I'd like to know a way to revert it back to the previous layout. But after listening to the "Real Mind of Mysonne" I clicked on the "Kill Mind of Hopsin" by Ludi Mofo. On the related links for that video was a diss by this horrible rapper, in my opinion, named The Jokerr. And he is HORRIBLE. I can say he's great at making videos on a low budget, but his music is stupid. He's the biggest hater rapper I've seen so far. And despite his greatness Hopsin is a pretty big hater. The only difference between the two is Hopsin releases singles and doesn't make them all about hating on people except "Kill Her" while all that I've seen by Jokerr are him hating. He just starts beefs, like what the fuck? He has no reason to hate on SwizZz (it was the diss video I was watching) and doesn't even express hate, he tells him that SwizZz lives in Hopsin's shadow. Well guess what Jokerr? SwizZz is signed to a label and better know than your dumbass. He's a much better rapper also. I'll give Jokerr props for his Funk Volume rip, but some of the stuff I heard in it I'm pretty sure was BS. He's just a horrible rapper and makes himself look stupid by dressing up like a wannabe juggalo and then ripping on them. Then there's a beef with Tech N9ne he tried to start, that failed. Tech N9ne isn't the best rapper in my opinion but he's not a bad rapper. Tech N9ne is really good.

Why The No Loverboy?

So my "avid readers" you're probably wondering why I haven't posted recently about some lovesickness I'm suffering or some girl I dream about now. Well one, I decided talking about girls on this wasn't really the best idea. I decided to try something different and just not mention her on here, not talk to her so as not to get into being good enough friends that dating is out of the question. So I decided I'd evaluate me and some of my better friends and how we are in our love lives. For me I'm the lovedrunk fool, or as one of my friends says, the manwhore. I jump from liking one girl to another faster than a drug dealer and clients. Every couple of weeks it's some new girl to be head over heels for. Well there's always one girl to be there for, but I'm not going to turn this post into a babble about her. Then my other friend is the loverboy. He doesn't think of other girls, he just likes one. He doesn't really talk about other girls either. He's loyal, like a dog. Then my other friend I'll mention is the slut. He doesn't care what it is that he's with as long as he's getting some and it's not a relationship. He's had a relationship before, and after it all he could think is WHY THE FUCK WOULD ANYONE WANT A RELATIONSHIP. And before anyone suggests it, no Blue isn't one of them. I'm talking about my guy friends and she's somewhere in-between. The reason why I call her my brister, or my sother.

Hahaha, My "Wicked Ways"

So one of my more popular posts, Adalia Rose and Her Retarded Progeria, got a comment yesterday. I didn't notice because when I check for comments I don't go to a comments tab, I go to the overview and that post is a couple months old. But to summarize it, I talk about the situation Adalia Rose is in and then complain about the people that are beating up on Cell, my favorite facebook personality. She tells me that I'm apparently full of hate and have wicked ways. Well I can tell Bailey Strobel she can suck my fucking dick. Even if that were accurate my post doesn't reflect that. I don't mock Adalia Rose. The only hate in the post was me mocking the people making fun of Cell. And then apparently it's mean? How the fuck? It's saying her mom needs to be reviewed by Child Services because Adalia was being exploited. Then she tells me she hopes I find happiness, fuck that. Besides the fact that I'm quite happy and was rounding near to being happy during Summer, it's not all that great. I found happiness, and I have it plenty, so she can go fuck herself. Then my "wicked ways?" Screw that. I've never been that sadistic, I have the potential but I ignore it mostly. I do follow the destructive path of my brother and his friends though. My friends and I've done such retarded and crazy things in the past year I can't remember them all. My sadism has been repressed but it was in bounty last year, key word is was. Then she tells me I should be ashamed because I said a girl needed help. This chick needs to watch what she says, because in my opinion she gave her support to the exploitation of children with fatal diseases. Now don't get me wrong, I'm all for exploitation of others, but to exploit a diseased little girl is a lot different. Doing something such as that is just plain wrong and if I were to stoop so low I would have no reason to live.

The Headaches I Get

My dad is the biggest irritant in the world. If I were to grow up and develop some type of irritant for chemical warfare I'd call it "Papa T Scratch Gas" because of how annoying my dad is. He just irritates me. Annoys me to an uncountable extent. For example, today at the store. It's on the way home and my brother's with us and he walks home from the store while I stay back to go in. I thought I was going in by myself because my dad was telling me where stuff is (even though I know where it is he's just a prick) but then he's going in with me. Then when I ask if he still needs me he's like, yes. I asked him for what, he just goes I need you. And he decided to go in with me because he doesn't trust me for no reason. He tells me I have to spend my own money on stuff that's personally mine. Well when I use his money, wait not his money my mom's money cause he's unemployed, to buy stuff that's personally mine it's cause it's for lunch. He gets mad at me for getting energy drinks, well I'd get a 4 pack of monsters a week and share it with my brother for when I need that boost. I use it for school, so he's saying I have to pay to do well in school. He's the one who puts a giant value on grades, well maybe if he let me get the monsters I would be more attentive in class. Atleast my math class, the other ones I'm fine in. Most of the time when we go to the store though he buys a shitload of snacks that only he eats. Or other people eat them but he won't share. He literally gets mad at people for eating it. There's other shit also. I'm selling candy at school and make a profit from it. But I leave the opened box I'm using in my living room on a recliner with the rest of my stuff for school. He ate some of my candy, well aware that it was mine and that I'm selling it, and when I asked him to pay for it he said no. I paid for it already, and he says no. On Halloween he wanted me to give candy from my box to the neighbor girl and refused to pay for it then also. The worst part is, he got mad when I said I wouldn't give it to him. It's cause of him that I lost 5 bucks. He's just an assholey prick. He feels entitled to spend other people's money but won't let people spend other people's money. He needs to get smacked. He's just a little kid that's been spoiled because technically he's an adult. But I'd like to see him living in an apartment by himself without any financial support from my mom and support his lifestyle. And no, my parents aren't divorced although it seems that way in this post. My dad get's disability checks because he's too lazy to get a job. He prefers to sleep all day. We had to write a persuasive essay in class where it's why a family member should be awarded with something. I awarded my dad with "Laziest Sack of Crap". And the things I used to support it seemed like I was exaggerating, but no I wasn't. I left out stuff also. He's just a waste of space. Spends all his time awake on facebook spouting crap no one cares about and considers it work. But when he has to do actual work, like take a car in to get serviced or schedule appointments he's too busy. He uses facebook as a crutch.

Wub Wub Wub

I've gotten into a dubstep phase. It started with my brother's friend showing me gloving, and when I watch the gloving videos I started listening to the music also.  Right now I can't stop listening to Datsik and need to add it to my phone. He's a pretty nice mixer, and my favorite so far is the Barrron Remix of Firepower. Then there's ones like "Too Late to Say No" that I can't get out of my head. It's helping me with my creative ability also. I just start thinking of stuff I can spit to some of the beats that I start to listen to. A song that's not by Datsik that I like is Knife Party's "Fire Hive". The music just pulls me in. It gives me a want to try to mix my own like I've done before.

I Ain't Got No Balls

I ain't got no balls

Yea I ain't got no balls

Bad bitches make me fall

While I sit an spit at yall

I actually got some balls

But they ain't the ones I want

So until further notice niggas I ain't got no balls

Yo! I ain't got balls

But nigga I'm a boss

Standing proud and tall

But missing my two balls

I can't ask a bitch out

But I can scream and shout

I'll fight you to the death

But bitch forget the rest

Cause I ain't got no balls

Bitch you got two balls

The biggest of them all

Just cause you got no girl

 Cuz dem bitches make you hurl

Don't mean you got no balls

You stubborn as fuck

Got that bastard luck

Now go bust a nut

And shut the fuck up

Homie I ain't got no balls

Cause ladies are my fall

Everything else is badass 

Muthafucka fuck em all

The ladies took my balls

Had them many days

So all I do is sit here 

and then I say

I ain't got no balls

Yea I ain't got no balls

Bad bitches make me fall

While I sit an spit at yall

I actually got some balls

But they ain't the ones I want

So until further notice niggas I ain't got no balls

At least you would run drugs

And hang out with the thugs

Don't need no bitch for tugs

See I ain't got that all

Cause I ain't got those balls

Nigga you got those balls

Now sit down shut up and enjoy the song

See you got them balls bitch

So stop whining nigtits

Just ask out that bitch

And then be done with it

If she says no

Then she's a hoe

But for the time being nigga just sit back, take a hit, and blow

Bitch I got the balls

The baddest of them all

Hoes come to my call

Cause they all know I'm raw

Niggas fuck you all

You always sayin naw

But until further notice niggas I GOT DEM BALLS

I started this thing in the shower, a place of many wonders, and ended it 5 minutes later out of it. Obviously the last part is bullshit, I don't get bait, atleast bait I want. But a lot of it is pretty accurate. I'm ballsy enough to do a lot of things but when it involves a girl I'd be better off not thinking about it. I just don't have the courage to ask a girl out, even over facebook. Well I can over facebook but that's after I get pushed to it or I just think, what the fuck why the hell not. And even then facebook doesn't count as asking a girl out. It's not face to face and it's a pussy move. Plus there's a better chance if it's face to face because she gives you credit for the fact that it's face to face. Not over facebook or through a text.

I Enjoyed Black Friday

So I really enjoyed Black Friday, not just because it allowed me to embrace my inner Jew. We went to the mall by my house, along with HHGreg. HHGreg was interesting, we didn't get anything there but we sure did looking. We were there for an Android Tablet that cost 50 bucks, when we found out where it was (Matress Center) it was out of stock. My brother and I had originally planned to be line hoppers but when we saw people getting shunned we went to the back, about a quarter mile from the store. I just sat there suggesting things to do, like tackle a guy that walked out of the store carrying a 40 inch or something in his arms by himself. There was some serious entertainment though, watching people argue over who got in the store first. It really opened my eyes to how materialistic people are. There was a girl that looked about 9th grade that I thought was going to cry because she might not get a giant T.V. At first I thought the people were arguing over exercise equipment though because both groups were fatasses. The mall was more interesting, I had been walking around airing out my shoulder (meaning I had a sleeveless on) and in shorts. I got stares for it. There was a group of faggots, 2 Asians and a scrawny white guy, laughing at me for it. I was about to turn around, flip them off, and call them pussies. And we had an interesting adventure. I went to Walmart because I'd intended to watch the chaos of employees walking out and provide chaos by shoving people into stands and aisles, but instead I bought a watch. Then my brother and I decided we'd go to Hot Topic, got a Mac Miller shirt. Then we went to Gamestop, it was going to be crowded because the line was so long it was intersecting another line for Victoria's Secret. I was surprised at how much we spent. Got 8 games total. Black Ops II, I play mostly party games; Oblivion; Bioshock; Crysis 2; Sleeping Dogs; Fallout: New Vegas; The Witcher II; and Dishonored. We ended up meeting up with my brother's girlfriend, who I've decided to be nicer to, and went to Spencer's. I love that fucking place, it surprised me when I found a stand dedicated to dildos though. I got a new Wiz Khalifa wallet while my brother got a rasta one. It was a pretty interesting night. There was more shopping, but for me that part was dull. Really, really dull. But my brother got me a sleek fox hat from Pacsun.

BLAH BLAH BLAH

So happy Thanksgiving BLAH BLAH BLAH, all that shit. I honestly don't get the point of even celebrating Thanksgiving. Not a lot of people see it for the idea of saying thanks, especially with this generation of rude assholes, but as the time of year you eat a turkey and go out at 12:00 in the morning for sales. And I don't have shit to be thankful for, I hate Thanksgiving. Maybe I can be thankful for Blue and my friends along with my current happiness. But weighed against all the crap I've suffered it's still not enough. It's like comparing a cow to a whale. And a lot of people don't have much to be thankful for. No I'm not talking about those whiny kids that when they don't get what they want they cry but are spoiled any other way. I'm talking about those people that go off to war and lose a limb and only have a medal to say thank you for the sacrifice. To the families that lose people to the war and all they have to commemorate it is a medal from the government that sent the mother or father to his or her death. Or the people that live on the streets. What are they going to be thankful for? Living in a shit hole country that only pays attention to the rich. Who treats soldiers under a certain rank like cannon fodder. But I still am quite thankful to have Blue in my life and always having her there for me. Same with a lot of my friends. And most of all my brother who's been there for me when I need help, who teaches me to fight, who pushes me to my limits. My parents can go fuck themselves though. My dad is a useless sack of shit and my mom is a stupid bitch. And also I see Thanksgiving as a holiday that celebrates when we began kicking the Native Americans off of their own land. Screw America.

FEEL THE BURN!!

So my brother started coaching me in more than just boxing and wrestling. Speaking of that I haven't practiced knocking the wind out of someone but I do practice punching to that if I were to get in a fight I don't destroy my knuckles. But he made me embody the words "Feel the burn". When I stopped it wasn't because I wanted to, it's cause I had to. My shoulder was about to tear and I could feel the fibers pulling apart with a sharp pain in it. He started me off on 100, where I pushed half way up before he had to spot. His version of spotting is really different from the usual. Rather than pulling it up all the way like most people would he uses 2 fingers on each hand and pushes lightly so that it still benefits me. On 90 I did 1 unassisted and 1 assisted. With 80 I managed 5 before I needed help, 2 helped ones. 70 I got to 9. 60 I did around 12 or 13. 60 is where it got to being easy and I did about 17. Then until I reached 30 I did 20 each. Pretty good workout, my arms are still wobbly and I have a problem with holding a cup. I know that by the end of winter break my arms are going to have doubled in size. And hopefully by then I'll have a six pack to accompany it, I just need to increase the amount of cardio I do.

The Nocturnal Rainbow

So I've been listening to Hopsin, well I always do but at a higher rate than I normally do, and one of my favorite songs started to leave a mark on me. Nocturnal Rainbows. It's because it embodies my supreme reason for skepticism. YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT'S REAL. I never do. Especially on days like today where everything's been up and down. My whole day has been in shambles. Right now I don't know whether I'm supposed to be expecting something either. For ups, SSX showed up along with other things. For downs, I'm pretty sure the girl I currently like is into some guy I despise. I just have so much shit to be down on, but just as much shit to be up on. I'm definitely going to be playing SSX all night though. By all night I mean I'm taking a nap after I finish this post and when I get up I get in my basement with a case of soda and hopefully enough snack food until I feel tired again. And then I'll have my laptop down there too. Hooked up with my super speaker that I got for 20 bucks. It's my iHome speaker with killer bass. I call it super speaker because it's really powerful for a 20 dollar speaker. But as I said earlier. I never know what's real or not. Especially since I've been BSed by so many people recently. A girl I formerly liked. A couple of my friends. And some other person I won't name because he/she may be reading this. No, it's not Blue. And even worse, I don't know what I think is really what I think. I'm so unsure of myself right now I could become a cultist like that. That says something because I'm not stupid enough to even let a cult talk to me.

The Mail Is A Bastard

So I bought stuff on Amazon, something I do every couple of months, but this time it's different. I bought a panda hat for Blue and SSX, a beast as fuck snowboarding game, for me. Now the panda hat showed up, it showed up on Saturday, but SSX still hasn't. They were supposed to ship together and everything, but still hasn't shown up. Hopefully it shows up tomorrow because I'm really psyched to play it. I've been waiting to play it for awhile. With just the demo I played it for 6 hours straight trying to get gold on it. Then it was played for 6 hours straight the next 2 weeks daily. Then I got tired of only coming up silver. I was just a couple seconds off of gold 2 times. TWO TIMES. Just watch, SSX got lost in the mail. It'd be the first time that's happened to me.

I've Had An Epiphany

I've happened upon a serious epiphany in the shower tonight. I realized what was in common between all the girls that I like besides them being Hispanic. THEY ARE THE "GOOD GIRL" ARCHETYPE. I happen to like to corrupt people. Not intentionally, I just realized it. I honestly don't know whether to feel good or bad about it though. But my best friend, male one, and a couple of my other guy friends. They've all been corrupted by me and prior to getting to be friends with them they had been somewhat good people. Or atleast behaved better. I just need to corrupt I guess. And I can exert influence when I want to. I'm pretty sure my need to corrupt is shared with my brother also. He has a high level of influence with his friends and has really corrupted his current girlfriend. I can't say I've corrupted Blue though. When I initially met her she appeared to be such a good and innocent little girl. Then when I started to talk to her more I realized that she had her own seed of evil sown in her. Basically I didn't need to corrupt her to my way of thinking, she already has one.

I Love The Night

If there's one thing I love is the night. Not just being in my room late at night and to myself but because of what I can do outside at night. I LOVE THE NIGHTLIFE. Of course I don't go out and pound shit and party, besides the fact that I don't know where to find those I wouldn't want to go because of what might happen. But just wandering around at night. I go out at 9:00 when I have friends over and just walk around for an hour. I'm fooling around at night of course. Last night I was going around with my white mask and brother's fedora on and would randomly start gangnam styling. And I mean serious messing around. I went around in a shopping center dancing around in the middle of the street and getting looks. I had a reason to wear the mask. Then in April I get a field trip to Virginia Beach and it'll be even better. We're going to analyze waves and stuff at the beach so we'll probably be staying on the Boardwalk, which has one of the best nightlifes nearby. I'd try to sneak out of the hotel we're staying at around 9:00 and go on rides and such. They have some pretty sweet rides. There's also bait to get, not just whores at night but bitches on the beach. If there's one thing that gets chicks is where you're wearing a fedora, sandals, khaki shorts, and a tank top or beach shirt while you're ripped. I'm close to being ripped well enough. Just another couple of months and I got a six pack. What adds to it more is smoking cigarettes and just sitting on the beach. I honestly don't like the idea of smoking to look cool, but on the beach I might as well. Who knows? Maybe I'll get a couple of numbers and hook up with some chick over facebook. A chick that lives near me. Then I've gotten a girlfriend that doesn't go to the same school as me. I only say this because I'm going on the trip connected to a program at my school that's available to students at other schools.

GAMING TO THE MAX

I got my friend Chentos over, "chentos_98" if you want to find him on PS3, and he brought Black Ops II. We planned to have 6 hours straight of gaming and then work on a project, and so far all I've seen is Zombies Transit. I really wish that I bought the game now, even though I didn't have all the money to spare for it. I still need to try Nuketown 2025, but if it's as good as Transit I can't wait.  And yes, this is going to be a short post. All it's about is the little of Black Ops II that I've played so far.

My Bad Luck Aura Knows No Bounds

So if there's one thing I have an effect on everything I own eventually breaks. My relatively new speaker already has a broken piece and my laptop that's only about a year old now has a broken hinge. When I went to fix the hinge it disconnected my screen from my laptop. So I ended up spending 2 hours trying to reattach the screen. Then I screwed over the casing also. It's all loose and floppy, more than it was before. And I'm worried I may have scratched something on the inside because I had to use a knife to pry open the casing. My biggest problem though was getting out the screws rather than attaching the screen. But now my laptop is screwy as fuck. And I could always go to get it repaired, but for 70 bucks. And it would be pointless because the hinge is the only thing I need to fix and it'll just detach again later.

Come On Bitch FIGHT!

So today I enjoyed myself by provoking an asshole in my French class. There was no fight, but there was definitely some threatening that I got. Basically he likes to act like a little kid and boasts of being "the best in the class". One day I said in my normal voice that all he's saying is that he thinks he's stupid and needs to reassure himself he's smart by repeating it. Which is what he was doing, connection made by basic psychology. He didn't hear me, but if he did he'd try to start shit. I know for a fact that he atleast acts like he's tough shit, I'm pretty sure he thinks that also. But then today I enjoyed myself even more because we had a sub for a second time. He was playing his music without headphones loudly all class and then would complain about hearing someone else's music even a little. I'm sitting on the other side of the classroom listening to my phone at it's lowest with my friends, and all he could do was complain and tell me to stop because he doesn't like my music. Now I didn't say anything, not one of those guys, but I eventually got annoyed. He later said that the next time he hears someone else's music he's going to hit them or something along the lines. Sadly that was right before the teacher told us we had to use headphones now. Then people were telling me to turn up my music. Now I would've, but I don't need to get in trouble with the teacher. I just said naaa. Then he said that he thinks I'm annoying, and I'm like "Me?". After he said, yea you I said yay. I like pissing you off. Then he goes I'd like to see what you say about that after school. So I respond by mocking him, I literally press my cheeks together with my hands and in a little girl voice I go "I'm so scared". It made some laughs, I enjoyed it. Now the words that were traded aren't exact for me, I didn't pay attention up until the point that I mocked him. But when I got home I asked my brother about fighting, and he showed me wrestling moves. He also showed me Muay Thai moves such as how to easily dodge a hit and knock the air out of the person. Basically, if the guy throws a punch I get up knock the air out walk back and poke them. Then as they fall I wave and smile. But I learned two methods for wrestling, I also need to practice judo throws. I don't have anyone to teach me them but basically I grab their arm after I duck a swing at my head, turn, and yank. Then when he's on the floor after I smacked him onto it I get on top of him and hit him in the face a couple of times. Or I just stomp his stomach, either way would work. And they're all simple techniques that aren't that hard to get the hang of, you just have to know them. There's also that if those 4 choices fail I can just beat the shit out of him. No hits to the face but to the gut so there's no marks. Practicing boxing and knowing technique to it will eventually pay off.

Video Addiction

Of everything I've been allowed to experience in my relatively short life I have a serious addiction to videogames. I drink about 2 energy drinks a week along with about 5 cups of coffee a week, but no caffeine addiction. I do so much stupid stuff when I'm bored, which is a lot, and it puts my life at risk, yet no, I'm not an adrenaline junky. I do call myself one though, but I can go without almost getting hit by cars for a couple of weeks and not care. But with videogames, I can't stop playing them. Not on a console, but on my computer. I have an Xbox and it's good and all but I prefer a computer because I've only had an Xbox for a year. Even though I like shooters and have a lot of them, I prefer tactitionary and semi-comedic games. Right now I've been playing XCom non stop, so alien fighting game. It sounds like a shooter, but you do squad warfare and disperse them out with factors like cover and hit chance clearly visible to you. It's also turn based. Then there's Dungeons of Dredmor. It's a jokey, turn based, rpg. And I mean really jokey, there's stuff like diggles, werediggles, pirate stats, etc. As for flashgames I've gotten into business ones like Swords & Potions and Jacksmith. Swords & Potions is really simplistic, you're a merchant and own a store. You tell people what to craft and it's a time-based game. There's the purchasable upgrades available to you that you use real cash for, no I don't do stuff like spend my money to improve in a game I may forget about. Jacksmith is crafting. Simple as that.

Originality, I See You But Can't Touch You

So as you know, I'm a sucky amateur glover. And I've been thinking about how to revamp my costume. I honestly should be getting a pair of gloves, currently looking at the pre-made "Gluttony" set by EmazingLights. But I started looking at pictures of one of my brother's glover friends and realized how unoriginal my costume is. Like, it fits together, but most glovers make their own. All I did was buy stuff online and put it on, played out. What I did notice though is that they all have something seen in every getup, that's accompanied by other stuff. There's one guy named Max Hatter that wears a giant hat in every pic, then the one I personally know wears a giant Cat Head all the time. They have an Alice In Wonderland theme going on. But I'd be "The Mask" because I'd have masks that I wear accompanied by hats. Then came the ingenious and original idea. Buy a sock monkey hat and a panda hat(Blue wanted one so it was in my head) and cut them in half and sew the halves together. Only problem is that they're wool so it'd be pretty complicated to do. But my white mask goes well with a fedora, and I can always wear a fedora with it and a panda hat. I still need to work on the originality aspect. The white masks cost me 5 dollars each and I can paint them. Blue gave me that idea. So either way I'm buying hats and acrylic paint to decorate my costumes. Then for the shirt I can wear my LED, accompanied by a whole bunch of EL wire or something. Or a tank top with EmazingLights on it. I could also go for "Pandaized" and build a custom glove set for it. (Blue gave me the panda theme altogether) Basically I get the mask and paint the black marks on it and wear the panda mask. Then my gloves will be black and white lights, yes there are black lights, and I'd practice tricks that utilize the coloring. I could have a mask to go with each hat, but I still don't know. Right now I only have two masks to use, both of which are white. If I go fedora I'd paint stuff on the mask still though to fit the fedora. Go for a mobster look.

The Block Strikes Back

So I obviously jinxed myself when I had the post, "Writer's Block Lifted". I keep forgetting to write, or can't think of shit to write about. I've had stuff to write about also, but haven't done it. It's because I've just bitch bitch bitched about it too much in the past so my fire's dwindled out and died. Prepare for 11:30 posts that are going to be barely a paragraph. Prepare for a shitload of pictures to makeup for me not having as much content in my posts. Prepare for random babbles that you have to wait a month for and wade through the incoherent boringness the rest of the month.

All The Fucking Frustration

So today I got into an argument over how well I know people in general and whether I really do know what I think I know about human nature. It was frustrating the fuck out of me because I was talking to a girl I like. I just didn't want to argue. But I just need to say this. I DO KNOW HUMAN NATURE. I got an ability to see what people think, just not when it concerns me. She goes, it only applies to people that you know well enough, girls do that with their friends all the time. I guessed who a guy liked without knowing him that well just from 2 notions. I notice things with how people smile around them, and how they act differently. I was so frustrated I didn't mention it to her, but I can just look at people and know. I got a high level of spiritualism, and it applies to this. The spiritualism boosts my intuitive abilities, something I didn't mention to her. But she was just fighting with me over it. It wore me out soooo, sooo fucking much.

Well I'm Sorry

I would like to formally apologize to anyone I may have insulted or offended through my blog. Only apologizing because the girl that I am the practical bitch of ended up reading my blog. Downside is it's cause she was bored. But she didn't like that I said she ain't got no ass, even though I shouldn't have been writing about her butt in the first place. She also didn't like my "rap" about marijuana. I actually understand why she didn't like them though, seriously the chorus used "Pussy Pussy Marijuana" for the first line. But it got me to thinking, I've probably offended or insulted a lot of people. Now to most people I probably intentionally insulted you, but with her I didn't. So let me rephrase it, I would like to formally apologize to anyone I UNINTENTIONALLY may have insulted or offended. Because those that were unintentionally done harm are not the ones I planned to target through my blog. I don't care if I pissed off some asshole that's overly patriotic about Canada but cares about American politics too. He can go fuck himself. Just like how I don't care that I insulted my brown friend that I refer to by so many degrading names it stopped being funny. But the viewers that I actually care to keep, or care for on a level of endearment, I would hate to have scared you away. Now the girl I like obviously only read my blog out of sheer boredom, but I would like to keep my viewers and know that I have an audience that's paying attention. This blog has helped me express my feelings and relieve stress, along with work on my creative/artistic side with stuff like writing raps, poetry, or songs. But I honestly hoped that maybe someone that is at the same point in life as me would read my blog and realize they aren't the only ones. That they probably have/ had it better off than me. The reason I say had is because my life has slowly improved, which has led to less content in these posts. These posts could use some serious improvements now that I think about it. Besides that I've stopped putting in pictures as much I run out of topics so I babble about random, unimportant shit too much. For christ's sake I made a rap about screwing a girl while smoking a whole bunch of marijuana. So just for shits and giggles I'm going to put a whole bunch of random pics of marijuana because I've said the word marijuana about 6 or 7 times in this post. That's because the word marijuana is going to be up and coming soon now that Obama was been elected for a second term. I heard that on the night of the election, once it was decided, three states legalized marijuana for any use, not just the medical use of marijuana. See that? I just made the word marijuana used more around 12 or 13 times.

Viva La Quince

So one of the girls I like is having a quinceanera in June and my friend asked me if I got invited because she invited a couple of guys on her bus and was pushed to invite him. So then he calls me up and asks and I said I wish I did get invited. She didn't want to invite him, I know that much. But then I wonder though, I'd be one of 3 or 4 white guys there while everyone else is Hispanic. I'd get scared. And we got to talking because I would honestly want to go and just to mess around. You know, gangnam style and twerk against a wall. He got invited to be a dancer on her court, something I'd feel honored to be. We were talking about the other girl I like, who he thinks I'm only second to another guy for her. She hasn't had a quinceanera yet and I hope I get invited to that one. It would be nice until I start dancing. If I ended up dancing with her I'd totally screw up though. I've never danced with a girl before, and barely hug people, and especially at something as momentous as a quinceanera I would screw up. Knowing me I'd probably accidentally grab her ass and get kicked in the nuts and then slapped. I'd love to be invited though, it'd feel special to me. I doubt that I'd get to dance with her though, I mean I feel close to the one I've loved for a while and my friend sees it the same way. But when I talk to her I get reminded that she and I aren't going anywhere. But oh well, I'll see how things play out.

OBEEZY!

When asked what political party I belong to I answer with demoplican or something along those lines. Personally this year I'd prefer Obama to Romney just because although Obama promised a whole bunch of shit he did manage to show some progress. I don't want to hear that shit that he raised gas prices. I got told to look them up by someone, even though I know the prices that I had to pay last year, and found that it was around 4 dollars, like I'd said to people. Then about a month prior to the election prices all of a sudden drop to 1.50 a gallon. So... technically on average Obama has improved the gas prices comparing the first year to this year. I just think with all that Romney has for a reputation he doesn't belong even in the office of governor. So I'm really glad that Obama won this election. Because with how well he did with Massachusetts Romney would have destroyed the economy in 2 years and we'd have a giant rise to crime to go with it. Also his plan to create jobs is bullshit. You don't say OH! I know, let the rich people keep more of their money, that'll obviously make them hire in the U.S. It is a load of shit and people know it. Obama offers an incentive, which makes more sense. Then the issue of abortion, we might as well leave it. I have a problem with the use of it just because you don't want to have a kid, but not with the use of it for rape babies and those unprepared to have a kid. Also, if they get rid of abortions then they need to distribute condoms for free or something so that we don't have a skyrocketing population. A skyrocketing population destroys an economy because there's a rate of population growth that doesn't fit with the rate of job creation. Also it would create a rise to crime that results in more deaths. There would be backwater abortions going on, not like there aren't right now but even more, done by shady doctors without a license or a revoked one. When you take something away, you need to usher in something else to replace it but with less considerable consequence if it's wide enough used to raise an issue. Prohibition failed because alcohol was a popular form of enjoyment and what are they going to do without it? THEY DIDN'T KNOW. And because they didn't have anything to fill the void left they eventually repealed it. With stuff like marijuana though it wasn't as popularly used when it was illegalized so there were no repercussions to face at the time. There is so much ethics in politics. I mentioned it to my dad how getting rid of abortion meant promoting condoms or other forms of birth control and when I explained it he said politicians don't think of that stuff. Of course they fucking do, they need to think of the consequences just as much as they need to the benefits. But just because Obama is president we can't blame everything on him. The president doesn't hold all that much power, he makes up 1/3 of our government and can get told off by the other 2 thirds. He just holds the most influence because while he is the only power in the Executive Branch the legislative is controlled by 535 people and the Supreme Court by 9 or something ( don't remember how many justices ).

Ganja Gangsta

Pussy Pussy Marijuana

Nigga Nigga smoke that ganja

Make it light, take a hit
Suck it in, pass that shit

Buy a pound, grab an ounce

Your bitch's face just got doused

Grind it up roll it down

Light the joint and go to town
Hit it once, hit it twice
This white nigga's feeling nice
Live it up with the gang
Don't stop keep doing your thang
Get a bowl and start to roll
Take what you want like a crow
See a bitch and pull up real slow
Slap dat ass cause we all know
You get what you want when you want
If you don't you're in that jont
Lighting weed everyday
Smoking shit everyway

And the hoes said
Pussy Pussy Marijuana
Nigga Nigga smoke that ganja
Make it light, Take a hit
Suck it in, Pass that shit

Trying out the brand new bong
Lighting up while you rap this song
Packing it with no regrets
While your damn slut is getting wet
Stick the joint in her mouth
She sucks in and then goes south
Busy pulling in that smoke
Every second take a toke
Bitch comes up ready to go
Get in the car and fuck that hoe

Rolling round the big town
Turned that frown upside down
Bitch we be hotboxing that shit
While yo bitch is busy taking licks
Windows up, A.C. down
Smiling big like you wear a crown
Open the door and the smoke pours out
Bitch that's what I'm talking about


So the hoe said
Pussy Pussy Marijuana
Nigga Nigga smoke that ganja
Make it light, Take a hit
Suck it in, Pass that shit

So I was bored and decided to write a rap about a couple of the different ways to smoke. I mentioned a whore also, but that was to just add it. This obviously shows though that I have an ability that I can't harness to truly express myself. 

I'm Still In Lalaland

If there's one thing I have a problem with it's getting over a girl. Even though my pre-date failure talks to me almost daily, the thing that always makes me hyper and insane and happy as fuck is talking to the girl that I was the bitch of. She just makes my heart flutter because I'm in love. I know she doesn't procure the same feelings, but I wish she'd come around eventually. I talk to my friends, and all I can say is just watch. Senior year she'll ask me out or something, or I'll grow balls and ask her out because I think she'll get into a special program in Virginia that is inter-school and she says yes. I can honestly imagine that happening because we've clicked a lot, same with me and the other girl. I really need to work on flirting with her though, there's some stuff I can't say to her because I like her because it's highly inappropriate but my other friends will and she flirts. Atleast I think she's flirting, I don't know for sure. But I do know my feelings for her will never go away, I just love her. That's it in simplicity, I Love Her. I can't explain why, and it's not just because she has a rocking bod. I can't express it in words, I feel drawn to her and her majesty. I just know it's not just because of her looks. She has no butt. She has boobs, but didn't when I started liking her. To me she's a work of art, but I got some friends that say her beauty is average. I could babble all day trying to figure out what it is about her that pulls me in.

Do You Hate Him Too?

So yesterday I was at the store with my friend and I was messing around and making fun of my retarded dad.  Then it hit me, I could actually become a comedian with him as my act. Being a comedian has been a nice dream of mine that I never pursued much because of what it brings along. Friends of comedians HATE THEM. It's because they get made fun of by the comedian on stage and it gets embarrassing. I personally wouldn't mind because I enjoy a nice laugh at myself, but most people have ego problems. But then it got me to thinking because we were talking about how our futures would play out and I said I'd probably be too used to a relaxed lifestyle when I enter college and have budgeting problems and need to do other stuff for money besides have a job. Then I realized, I could be a late night comedian while I worked my way through college. Then, hopefully, I get picked up by Comedy Central or something and they give me a program or a comedy special. I, like lots of comedians, would spend most of my specials talking about my past. The first special would be called "Do You Hate Him Too?" to mock my dad, something I have a talent for. My next special would be "I Need To Be A Bitch" talking about my girl problems and how I literally become the bitch of the girl I like, so far none have tried to take advantage of it. Then I thought of another one I could do, and it hit me, the jewel of it, the funniest one I could think of, "Snapbacks and Swagfags". It'd be where I talk about my self-discovery and this blog, and how I'm a white rapper and shit. A.K.A. stuff that makes people actually lose their asses when they laugh. I mean, I look like a poser the way I dress right now. But trust me, I'm anything but, and I don't care whether people in real life believe it or not. And I'd do tours for the military also, with a small fee. Just like you pay for me to fly out, I'll even ship out with the troops, and I get some walk around money for every venue based off of weekly. I'd stay at the base and everything. I'd be doing the, "Do You Hate Him Too?" routine to remind the troops they have fathers that were actually good parents and worth fighting for. But then, what would I actually do as an adult? Well I'd be either a comedian, some type of engineer or inventor, or have a military career. My "rapping" isn't going anywhere, I know that much. But it would be chill as fuck if I could be all three plus an underground rapper.

Working On Rapping To A Beat

So I've been trying to move out of A Capella and onto freestyling to beats. I have the instrumentals from Ill Mind Of Hopsin V and Reefer Madness but I stumble in my words. Most of the time when I rap it's in my head or out loud quietly where people can't hear. I almost never have a beat to do it to either and it's just my natural rhythm. But I decided I'd try to freestyle to a beat, which I've failed at stumbling all the way. With Ill Mind V I had a good start, but it failed fast.

What I had so far.
I hate life, My head, It feels dead
I just wanna go home, lay down, go to bed
Don't wake up the next fucking morning
You bitches won't here none of my snoring

The only problem is that I can't catch the natural flow the way rappers do. One thing that's made me wonder a lot is how do rappers normally write their music. Do they prewrite it and then bust it to a beat. Or do they make the beat and listen to it a lot to get it in their head, and then write music to go with the flow. But when I tried I stumbled after a while and had to keep restarting. It's been a while since I've actually rapped out loud where I could here myself though. It's going to take a lot to move me out of my damn slump that I'm stuck in.

Nothing Good Ever Lasts Me

I guess one thing does, Blue. A friend I can always count on to be there for me and listen to me. But right now I'm in a slight depression, not a serious one. My biggest problem in this world isn't my weight, it's not hygiene, not my appearance, not grades. Nooooo, my biggest problem is girls. I got told she liked some other guy that asked her out yesterday. I'm chill with it, I mean like seriously, IT WAS PREDATING. I didn't even have a real relationship, just a test. But those 3 days were like a fucking dream for me. I didn't jack off for those days either, 4 days total. I don't need to when I have a girlfriend that I like. It's a horrible trade-off I suffer though. 2 days of happiness bring me a week or two of depression. I guess it's just the way my life works. But today and yesterday haven't been my day anyways. I barely ever have "my day" though. When I do though, it's followed with a giant backlash. I honestly scared myself though. My face doesn't show any emotion when I'm at home unless it's laughing. I don't even laugh aloud. All that happened when I got told was well nothing, I mean after a while my chest started hurting, but my face was blank. I was just like, what the hell just happened but I don't give a fuck anyways. But my biggest problem is girls for a reason. I honestly think I have a good chance with girls, I just have my own standard. It's only one, but it's a serious one. I HAVE TO ACTUALLY LIKE THEM. I'm not one of those guys that could bare to just date a random girl that I think is hot. If a girl tells me she likes me, I won't do anything about it. I won't go out with her. Well I might, but it depends on if I actually like them like that. I hang with guys that will literally go out with a girl just for ass and boobs though. With girls there are 3 paths they can go down after we become "friends". The reason I say friend in "" is because the word friends implies a certain bond while most of the time it's an acquaintance. But after acquaintance it's either close friend, serious love interest, or friend that I occasionally get a minor crush on. It's normally the third one though. Every year I have one serious crush, I'm pretty sure this whole year the only girl I'll think of that makes my heart swoon will be the one I just finished predating. And right now there are 2 girls that are close friends with me. But seriously though, my love life is in shambles. I'll probably stay a girless virgin with no one to like me the way I like them until I'm 40 years old.

My Teeth, Just Can't Not Laugh

So today I had a dentist appointment and was met with a serious surprise. For those that don't know I have checkups every 3 or 6 months and the dentist kinda got scared. I mean, I'm not the best brusher, especially since I don't brush a lot, so when they saw my teeth and were surprised that means something because they see them every couple of months. I have 10 cavities, and about 3 worry spots. I have all those because of my diet, not because I don't brush enough. In fact when I didn't brush a lot I barely ever got cavities, and now that I've started to brush I got cavities it doesn't make sense. Well it's because I drink a lot, and I mean a giant amount, of Vitamin Water. I don't drink soda that often, well at least used to, and barely ever have candy even on Halloween. But the reason Vitamin Water destroyed my teeth is because it's more acidic than other drinks, doing more damage to a set of teeth. So now I have to go for 3 or 4 appointments to fix my cavities resulting in costing about 1000 dollars. I also need to use a super tooth paste to strengthen my teeth, which have been highly demineralized by the water and my braces.